...AND YOU DO NOT
WANT TO BE ON IT 👹
Friday the 13th gets all the glory, but Monday the 13th seems way more frightening.
Sure, you and your besties may get slaughtered one by one by an unknown slasher in a hockey mask on the occasion of the former, but at least it's the weekend! If you survive to see Saturday the 14th, you've got the rest of the next two days to process that trauma.
But Monday the 13th? Not only is there a hockey-loving slasher with a fondness for kitchen cutlery on your tail, but your boss and/or professor expects that Powerpoint and/or term paper on their desk Tuesday morning, and they are sure to be unswayed by your murder-evading excuses.
"OH YEAH!" - Jason 'Kool-Aid Man" Vorhees, probably
GIF via Paramount / Friday the 13th
GIF via Paramount / Friday the 13th
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In other news — and related to that sweet tee up top — we are less than one month away from Krampusnacht 2023! Unless you want to end up stuffed into his sack and dragged to the underworld, be a good boy/girl/person and order some fresh threads from Boredwalk! This will simultaneously protect you from Krampus's fashionista bestie the Yule Cat, who only devours those who failed to receive new clothes as gifts. We're really providing a public service here.
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If you need a reason to get out of bed this morning... these random occasions are unlikely to be the impetus. Happy National Hug A Musician Day if the spirit moves you (but only if you get their prior consent first), and happy Sadie Hawkins Day if you're into cis-het reversals of traditional gender roles. If you'd rather stay single than navigate a sea of undesirable mute and insanely violent castoffs still on the market, though (looking at you, Jason), we wouldn't blame you.
Let's kick off the week with a few famous November 13th birthdays and historical facts:
• On this day in 1922 the US Supreme Court upheld mandatory vaccinations for public school students in Zucht v. King. How novel! A commonsense approach to epidemiological safeguards.
• In 1940 Walt Disney's animated musical epic Fantasia was first released at New York's Broadway Theatre
• Birthday cake all around for: Scottish novelist Robert Louis Stevenson of Kidnapped, Treasure Island, and The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde fame (1850), Negro League baseball legend Buck O'Neil, who was an irrepressibly joyous ambassador for the sport — warts and all — his entire life (1911), actress Frances Conroy of Six Feet Under and American Horror Story fame (1953), talk show host Jimmy Kimmel (1967), actor Steve Zahn of Reality Bites, Saving Silverman, That Thing You Do!, and You've Got Mail fame (1967), and Strokes bass player Nikolai Fraiture (1978)
• Pour one out for: Author Margaret Wise Brown of Goodnight Moon fame (d. 1952), and rapper, Wu-Tang Clan alum, and Grammy Awards legend Ol' Dirty Bastard of "[being] for the children" fame (d. 2004)
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Sadly there is no new customer Q&A this week due to lack of volunteers! If you're feeling even moderately outgoing and would like to be featured in an upcoming Monday email (and are a customer with some Boredwalk tees, tanks, hoodies, towels, bags, or books to show off), just reply to this and let us know and we'll send you some fun questions!
We'll be back here in your inbox on Wednesday with some more random holidays to observe, historical tidbits to acknowledge, and fun links to entertaining content! Until next time...
Peace, love, and new clothes,
Matt
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