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In a brownie state of mind 😋
Happy National Brownie Day! No, not the household sprites from Scottish folklore. Also not the 7-9 year old tier of the Girl Scouts of America. Definitely not the hapless NFL team from the great city of Cleveland. (Sorry, Browns fans. There's always next season!)
😕 I'm very confused.
Happy National Gazpacho Day! You may be asking yourself "why are we celebrating a chilled soup in December? Especially when that particular soup's star player is the tomato, which isn't remotely in season in December? And what does that have to do with the coffee-themed hoodie up top?"
🥃 It's National Bartender Day, so remember:
Happy National Bartender Day! I dunno about you, but I love a good bartender. Some of my most formative adult moments have occurred in bars:
😮 A holiday season candy with bark AND bite? 😋
Happy National Peppermint Bark Day! I have a feeling that a LOT of December's random holidays are going to be Christmas-themed, which is frankly pretty played out and rather unimaginative and tiresome, but I can get behind a day all about mint-flavored chocolate.
🤖 Last call for Cyber Monday savings — ends at midnight! 🎁
Happy National Lemon Cream Pie Day! Hopefully the tart zing of that lemon curd jolts you into remembering that today is also Cyber Monday, aka the last chance to save on Boredwalk merch until next year.
🤔 The best way to beat the Black Friday crowds? 💡
Happy National Cake Day! In the spirit of having your cake and eating it too, why not let your itchy clicking/tapping finger do the shopping while you lounge around in sweats and recover from yesterday's culinary festivities?
🎶 I can hear music...
Happy National Jukebox Day! Given that today is also informally designated as Drinksgiving, these two lesser holidays go together like peas and carrots (or beer and peanuts
🤯 Hurry! Our BIGGEST sale of 2021 ends in 72(ish) hours!
I hope this email finds you bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Why? Because you're going to need ALL your energy and wits about you while you try to figure out exactly which Boredwalk items you'll add to your shopping cart before our BIGGEST sale of 2021 ends at 11:59PM Sunday night!
😒 Are you fed up with...
Happy National Unfriend Day! Are you still watching that girl who sat behind you in high school Spanish class constantly post her trite inspirational quotes on Facebook and pictures of her all-inclusive resort vacations? You can "choose joy" all you want, Señorita, but don't do it around me; I've chosen darkness.
Loving that brisk autumn breeze? 🍂
Happy National Recycling Day! Will recycling in and of itself solve climate change? Nope! But it's an important part of the multi-pronged effort required to effect real change, and it's a pretty low-effort activity for us all to engage in that also allows you to feel smug toward the litterbugs of the world.
🌬️ Cool weather and/or reality got you down? 🥶
Happy National Happy Hour Day! What better way to try and forget that the world is going downhill fast than by ingesting some reduced-price snacks and libations? A half-priced domestic and some cheap wings & fries may not solve all of civilization's ills, but it will fill your tummy and blunt the sharper edges of reality for a spell. Sounds like a win to me!
😒 Thanks for nothing, November 10th!
Happy Area Code Day, I guess. As much as we enjoy telling you about the arbitrary made-up occasions we should celebrate on any given Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, this one really feels like scraping the bottom of the barrel in terms of occasions. You might say that November 10th is really (wait for it)...phoning it in.