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Happy Redhead Appreciation Day! If your 16th chromosome happens to be graced with a mutated MCR-1 gene, get after it today, you fabulous ginger so-and-so!

September 23rd is also National Dogs In Politics Day. I don't really have anything else to add to that, other than it is VERY TELLING that the current occupant of the White House has no pets and continually uses the word "dog" as a pejorative descriptor for people he doesn't like. Meanwhile, his opposing applicant for the job has two very good boys, Champ & Major. I'm not saying that being a pet parent automatically equals being a top-notch President, but speaking as someone who routinely cleans up gross messes that occur outside of the litter box, it does entail a capacity for patience and persistent, unconditional love that probably comes in handy when dealing with Congress.

Boredwalk emails: come for the links, stay for the incisive political pet analysis! #BarkTheVote

Alright, let's eat some birthday cake!

• First up, cut an RBG-sized piece for Victoria Claflin Woodhull, born this day in 1838! Ms. Woodhull was a luminary of the women's suffrage movement in the U.S. and in 1872 became the first woman to run for President of the United States, with abolitionist Frederick Douglass nominated as her Vice Presidential running mate on the Equal Rights Party's ticket. She was a pretty controversial figure throughout her life, not just for the progressive stances of her youth, but also for the pretty conservative turn she took as she got older. That didn't stop her from also being the first woman to own and operate a successful stock brokerage and among the first to found a newspaper, Woodhull & Claflin's Weekly, which began publication in 1870. She was a pretty interesting woman, to say the least; look her up!

• Next, bop down a bite for legendary composer, bandleader, and saxophonist John William Coltrane, born this day in 1926! He's probably most well-known for the more avant-garde work of his later career, particularly A Love Supreme and Ascension, but my favorite albums of his are 1958's Blue Train and 1963's Ballads.

• Prefer soul to jazz? Perhaps you'd dig a little music from birthday boy Ray Charles Robinson, born this day in 1930! Popularly referred to as "The Genius", Mr. Charles famously liked all sorts of genres, and successfully synthesized elements of jazz, R&B, gospel, pop, and even country & western into something wholly unique — all while being blind since early childhood due to glaucoma.

• Finally, squeeze one last bite in for Bruce Frederick Joseph "The Boss" Springsteen, born this day in 1949! Keep that bite small, though — the noted fitness freak maintains a decades-long primarily vegetarian diet, still runs six miles per day and lifts three days every week in an effort to continue playing 2-3 hour-long concerts in his seventies without needing to be helped off the stage. Born To Run may have jump-started his stalled career, and Born In The USA may have made him an international superstar, but for my money it's all about Darkness On The Edge of Town and The River. 

OK, link time!

1. Feeling upbeat? These baby hippo memes will cure what ails you and bring you crashing right back down to Earth.

Nothing says "you haven't made it, and you probably never will" like an adorable baby animal telling you "the world owes you absolutely nothing." From the mouths of babes, indeed!

2. The ageless wonder Paul Rudd has a message for his fellow youngsters: wear your damn masks!

I'm not sure what is more ridiculous: a handsome 51-year-old actor dressing and talking like a 26-year-old hype beast, or the fact that actual 26-year-olds are still walking around in public in 2020 not wearing face coverings. #CoinFlip

3. "Goth Martha Stewart" Christine McConnell purchased a creepy Victorian mansion, and it's very on-brand.

If you're unfamiliar, Ms. McConnell makes wonderful crafts and cakes with a decidedly macabre bent. Also, if you ARE unfamiliar with her, it's certainly not for lack of my trying, as it seems like I attempt to get more people to follow her at least once per quarter via these emails, our podcasts, etc. Meredith and I recently became Patreon supporters of hers, mostly because she'll need some scratch to decorate this massive new house she just acquired. I hope she uses that $5/month for something especially spooky!

4. Texas is full of vampires, and Fodor's certainly makes them seem more cuddly than cannibalistic.

Seriously — these generous goths are registered as a 501(c)(3) nonprofit who are involved in charitable work ranging from blood drives (naturally) to helping kids with medical needs, exotic animal rescue organizations & shelters, and domestic abuse prevention orgs. Talk about bleeding hearts!

5. Rick Beato dissects great songs from across genres and generations, and it's awesome! 

Mr. Beato is a musician, producer, performer, and music theorist who regularly breaks down what makes great songs...well, great...in his YouTube series. If you've ever wondered why certain songs send a tingle down your spine but never understood exactly why, he's here to help you articulate that feeling!

6. BONUS: People in NYC and San Francisco have been enhancing statues around the cities with Ruth Bader Ginsburg's trademark lace collar, and it's almost enough to bring a tear to my eye.

I'm not crying, YOU'RE crying!

Happy Wednesday! Also, happy Mexican Independence Day AND National Guacamole Day! Now THAT is a 1-2 punch I can get behind!

Today is also National School Backpack Awareness Day. Hooray, I guess? Seriously, who is this holiday even for? Jansport and Eastpak's marketing department, I suppose. Still, though — what exactly are we meant to be "aware" of here? When I think back to my school days — aka, Peak Backpack Awareness, Matt Edition — I was mostly aware that "these straps are cutting off circulation to my arms" and "I should really make better use of my locker, because this thing is heavy AF."

Moving along, I hope you're wearing your eating pants because we've got a lot of cake to get through!

First up, alles gute zum geburtstag to Karen Horney, born this day in 1885! Ms. Horney was a German-American psychoanalyst whose primary claim to fame was exposing the inherent male bias in the Freudian analysis of women. Which is admittedly awesome, but it also is kind of ridiculous that it took an advanced degree to legitimize her claims when anyone with a copy of Freud's Studies on Hysteria and a pulse could have come to the same conclusion. Classic patriarchy — never change! (Don't worry, I know you won't!)

Next, send a slice across the table to legendary jazz guitarist Charlie Lee Byrd, born this day in 1925! Mr. Byrd's classical finger-picked style was heavily influenced by Django Reinhardt, but Byrd's career is most associated with the Brazilian bossa nova style popularized in the 1950s and 1960s by João Gilberto and Antonio Carlos Jobim.

Sticking with six-string slingers, happy birthday to Riley B. "B.B." King, also born this day in 1925! Besides his renown as a player, he was also an accomplished singer, songwriter, and producer, and is regarded as both one of the best blues guitarists of all-time and the most influential. Mr. King passed away in 2015 at the ripe old age of 89, and the thrill has been gone ever since. 

Today is also the birthday of actor Mickey Rourke, born this day in 1952! Besides his starring roles in such classics as Diner, Rumble Fish, Angel Heart, and Barfly, he's probably best known for becoming a sex symbol opposite Kim Basinger in the film 9 ½ Weeks and then promptly destroying his handsome face with a four-year detour as a professional boxer in the early 1990s before his career comeback in the 2000s with The Wrestler, Sin City, and Iron Man 2.

Finally, a very illusory piece of cake is in order for David Seth Kotkin, aka David Copperfield, born this day in 1956! Little Matt once witnessed Mr. Copperfield make a facsimile of the Statue of Liberty disappear live on stage at the Patriot Center in the mid-1980s, but his most impressive magic trick is that he still looks exactly the same now as he did then. Presto! 

OK, link time!

1. Cartoonist Mo Welch's Instagram is giving me life right now, and if you like Boredwalk, you'll probably like their work, too!

Skeptical? Here's a teaser quote from one of their recent posts: "Two-day-old spaghetti in bed at 3pm is the breakfast of champions." See? You'll love it!

2. Everything may be trash...but not these grapes!

Someone recently commented on one of our ads "are these supposed to be 2020-themed?" If there's one thing a seasoned Boredwalk fans knows, it's that everything was trash before Covid, and will continue to be trash forevermore. Thankfully, even trash pandas like this little masked marauder get a respite from the trash heap.

3. This Japanese artist is doing some next level work with a pretty unconventional canvas: freshly fallen leaves.

I'm always blown away by how certain artists can work so small...but then I'm also impressed with artists work in a really massive scale, too. I guess I'm saying I'm just impressed by artists in general.

4. Great memes reacting to NASA's announcement this week regarding the presence of alien life in the clouds of Venus.

2020 is still keeping it fresh in September! What will the rest of the year bring?

5. The Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards finalists were just announced, and I can't wait to see who wins!

MY money's is on Christina Holfelder's Yakking Penguin, but we'll have to wait until the winner is announced on October 22nd, so stay tuned!

It's me, Meredith (again)! You may be thinking "OK, one email is fine and dandy, but two is a pattern. What exactly did Matt do that warranted offing him, and where did you hide the body?"

As exciting as the prospect of getting away with murder in plain sight is, the reality of the situation is much more mundane: as I'm typing this it is September 8th, which is Matt's birthday, so I'm giving him the gift of one less hour or so of work. I hope he likes it!

Alright, you know the drill: let's have some birthday cake for various nouns (both proper and improper) that are celebrating milestones today, September 9th!

First up, happy 170th to the great state of California, which was admitted into the Union as the 31st state on this day in 1850! The Golden State may have got its start thanks to the gold rush of 1849, but nowadays it's mostly flames in them there hills.

Next, try a little tenderness as you tear into a slice for the king of Stax soul himself, Otis Redding, born this day in 1941! Two of the things that go unsung about Mr. Redding are his skill as a songwriter, as well as his acumen as a businessman. Not only did he write 'Respect' (popularized by Aretha Franklin) and his own hits 'Try A Little Tenderness' and '(Sittin' on the) Dock of the Bay', but he also understood the value of his work and retained copyright ownership of his songs, which made him a much more financially secure and successful musician and performer in the 1960s than many of his contemporaries who were often willing to sign whatever paperwork was put in front of them in order to get time in a recording studio. Tragically, Otis died in a plane crash at the age of 26, just three days after recording 'Dock of the Bay', which would become the first posthumous number one single upon its release.

Finally, today is also the anniversary of Elvis Presley's first appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show in 1956! The studio cameras focused on his upper torso and legs to avoid showing his pelvis gyrations, which many Americans — including Ed Sullivan himself — thought unfit for a family show. 

OK, link time!

 1. Nothing relaxes us like the gentle undulations of a vampire squid.

Sure, a stiff drink and a gummy will also do the trick, but sometimes you want something a little more...meditative.

2. Sure, other people have died before, but did they do it in an explosion of glitter and bats?

No? Well then I guess recently deceased witch Holly Blair of Idaho is something of a game changer! If my obituary is half as epic as this one, I'll die a moderately content desert witch.

3. Artist Masayoshi Matsumoto makes incredibly detailed balloon animals, and I am here for it.

There's something delightfully impressive about achieving this level of detail in a medium not know for its level of detail. 

4. Nathan The Cat Lady makes lo-fi music videos with his feline friends, and they're really cute!

It's also very relatable that he always gravitates toward the animals in the house whenever he's at a party. *raises hand* It me.

5. Sarah draws funny cartoons, and sometimes they get published in fancypants periodicals!

Anyone that can visually describe the absurdity of life as a baseball fan in 2020 deserves more followers. Though I hate baseball, so it's no more or less absurd than it is any other year in my book. Sorry, Matt! You let me write the emails, you're gonna have to deal with some jokes about how terrible baseball is!

It's me, Meredith! Usually Matt writes these emails and I lurk behind the scenes suggesting links and trying to catch typos, but right now he's busy drawing some drunken fiends for sharing later this week, so I've taken over the email!

We'll get to the feast of tasty links in just a minute, but before we do that, let's kick things off with some cake and talk September 2nds of yore!

• First up, Happy Birthday to the dreamy and all-around-nice guy, Keanu Charles Reeves, born this day in Beirut, Lebanon in 1964!  He's not only known for starring roles in blockbusters such as Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure, The Matrix, and John Wick; he's also known for his generosity and philanthropy. Reeves reportedly shared back-end profits on The Matrix sequels with the movies’ special-effects and costume teams and has launched a foundation that funds children’s hospitals and cancer research. What a swell guy!

• Do robots like cake? I sure hope so, because it's 01000010 01001001 01010010 01010100 01001000 01000100 01000001 01011001 time for the ATM! (That's binary for "birthday"). The first one started dispensing cash in New York City on this day in 1969. Beep-boop-ka-ching!

• Finally, a Ngày Quốc Khánh shoutout to Vietnam! On this day in 1945 Ho Chi Minh declared Vietnam independent from France.

OK, link time!

1. Everyone's so goddamn bored in quarantine, even the birds!

That's why this little lovebird has taken up skateboarding. You can check out her moves and mastery of the half-pipe over on Instagram.

2. Sick of waiting for Boredwalk emails to catch you up on history lessons you never asked for?

Swing by Weird History's Twitter account for fun facts, like the one about Leonardo da Vinci buying caged animals at markets just to set them free, or the one about Persians using cats as shields against Egyptians in the battle of Pelusium (525 BCE) — mainly due to Egyptians having a prohibition on killing cats. Sneaky!

3. We know you love books, but what about wacky book dedications?

OMG Blog has compiled a collection of some of the weirdest and funniest book dedications ever. My favorite? "I want to thank everyone who helped me create this book, except for that guy who yelled at me in Kmart when I was eight because he thought I was being 'too rowdy.' You're an asshole, sir."

4. Sandwich Bag Dad has been drawing "dad jokes" on his kids' lunch bags for 8 years!

Lucky for us he's shared them on Instagram and they are adorable. If you love puns, comics, and silly humor, this Instagram account will give you life.

5. The jerks are finally getting a journal!

No need to run out to the jerk store for this rousing read. Humorist Glen Tickle is putting together a magazine about the jerks you know. Just send him a few bucks and some info about the jerks who belong in his magazine and he'll not only feature your least favorite person in his disapproval digest, he'll send them a copy so they know just how terrible they are.

Happy Women's Equality Day! Also, happy National Dog Day! You may be wondering "hmm...how should I celebrate today?" Assuming you live with one, I think it would be a capital idea to walk your dog, give it an extra belly scritch, and then check your voter registration to make sure you're properly enfranchised come November 3rd!

Before we get to the links, though, you know what time it is — CAKE TIME!

• First up, happy birthday to the Krakatoan volcanic eruption, born this day in 1883! The Indonesian island explosion was so massive that it was heard 2,200 miles away in Madagascar, spewed ash 50 miles up into the atmosphere, and between the explosion itself and the subsequent 131-foot tsunamis it generated, it resulted in the deaths of 36,000 people. Which is very tragic, but also very metal. 

"How did you die?"

"Volcanic eruption shot with a tsunami chaser!"

See? Metal AF.

• Cut a piece for the 19th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, officially ratified on this day in 1920! The 19th Amendment secured the right to vote for women. (Side rant: It drives me nuts when writings say the 14th and 19th Amendments "gave" the right to vote to people of color and women, as though it was some passive gift handed out as an afterthought by kindly old white men with hearts of gold and not something that was fought for, tooth and nail, for centuries. Using the word "gave" to describe this exchange of power is linguistically lazy. End rant!)

• Sling a slice over to voice actor extraordinaire Donald Leroy "Don" LaFontaine, born this day in 1940! You've definitely heard the guy's voice, even if you don't recognize the dude's name — he's the "in a world" guy from all those blockbuster movie trailers.

• Bop a bite into your blowhole for Branford Marsalis, born this day in 1960! Along with his brothers Wynton, Jason, and Delfeayo, the saxophonist spent much of the 1980s and 1990s pushing the jazz idiom in exciting new directions, and performed & recorded with an eclectic group of musicians, including Art Blakey, Sting, The Grateful Dead, and DJ Premier of Gang Starr.

• Finally, happy birthday to comedian, writer, producer, and Emmy-winning actor Melissa Ann McCarthy, born this day in 1970! 

OK, link time!

1. Homophones Weakly is the best way for grammarians to pass the time.

Bruce Worden's blog is, in his own words, "a visual exploration of words that look the same, sound the same, or are otherwise easily confused. Updated weakly through 2016, now only occasionally." It's...pretty funny.

2. A Redditor asked US postal workers last week what customers can do to help USPS, and the responses are great!

While a lot of replies were of the "an ice cold bottle of water would be great" variety, but I also like the fact that a lot of them just appreciate a smile or friendly "hello!"

3. Matt Shirley makes funny charts and posts them to Instagram.

Whether you need a visual guide to instruct you in the correct proportions of a mimosa, the amount of experience needed for any kind of job, or the worst tourist attraction in every US state, Matt's got it covered.

4. Artist Alex Solis draws a lot of things, but my favorite series of his features cute representations of natural predators and their prey.

It's bloody (really bloody) adorable. Here's a sampling of the series as culled from his Instagram.

5. Ben & Jerry's has a literal graveyard for it's failed flavors, and the headstones are as pun-tastic as you'd imagine!

This is awesome, but not as awesome as finding that (thankfully) their Cinnamon Buns flavor has not yet shuffled off this mortal coil.

Happy Islamic New Year! Also, happy National Potato Day, World Humanitarian Day, and National Aviation Day!

I don't know how you plan to celebrate all those events, but I definitely plan on drowning myself in a variety of potato dishes later this evening. 

Before we get to the links, though, some birthday wishes are in order!

• First up, feliz cumpleaños to baseball legend Roberto Enrique Clemente Walker, born this day in 1934! Mr. Clemente wasn't nearly as heralded during his playing days as he should have been due to playing in the smaller Pittsburgh market, but his outfield exploits were impressive enough to make him the first Latin American player enshrined in the Baseball Hall of Fame. Beyond his on-field abilities, though, he was also heavily involved in charity work during the off-seasons, delivering baseball equipment, supplies, and food to those in need in Latin American and Caribbean countries. He actually died in a plane crash in 1972 at the age of 38 while trying to deliver aid to earthquake victims in Nicaragua. The very next year, Major League Baseball began awarding the Roberto Clemente Award to the player who "best exemplifies the game of baseball, sportsmanship, community involvement and the individual's contribution to his team."

• Next, happy birthday to actor Patrick Wayne Swayze, born this day in 1952! For a period of time — roughly 1983, when he starred as "Darry" in the film adaptation of S.E. Hinton's The Outsiders, through 1991's Point Break (still to this day one of my dad's favorite films, and yes, that dad joke of a subject line was definitely inspired by him) — the world was legitimately "crazy for Swayze." He still had a robust career throughout the 90s and 2000s before his untimely death from cancer at the age of 57. Bigby, our cat, keeps the flame lit, though — his favorite movie of all-time is Road House. 

OK, link time!

1. Aquascaping is the cool hobby I never knew existed that I now desperately want to take up.

The Green Machine isn't the only company that specializes in aquascaping, but wow, do they get bonus points for presentation! H/t to BoredPanda (no affiliation with Boredwalk) and Reddit user /u/isaac_horstmeier for clueing me in!

2. Matty Benedetto makes unnecessary inventions that are somehow very necessary...for making me laugh.

I first became familiar with Matty's absurdist "products" after he started posting them on Reddit a year ago, but even during the pandemic he's been cranking out hilariously useless stuff that's very of-the-moment, including Streaming Roulette Dice™ (for when you can't decide what to watch next), the Drink O'Clock™ (to help you determine when to switch from coffee to alcohol and vice versa), and The Sourdough Satchel™ (for when you want to take your bread baby out for a socially distanced stroll, I guess).

3. Ever felt like Mother Nature just isn't bringing her A-game? Now you can sit in judgment of her work by rating the meadows she produces.

Honestly, I feel like there is beauty everywhere in nature, but some of the photography here could use some work. Judge the humans behind the photos instead!

4. Mimi Choi's Instagram is where makeup and surrealist art go hand in hand!

Salvador Dalí famously stated "I don't do drugs — I am drugs", and based on Mimi's work I feel confident that she is operating on a similar level to ol' Sal.

5. Swedish art collective Anonymouse have made a habit of building miniature houses for mouses* and displaying them all around the streets of Sweden. They're as adorable as you're imagining.

*Yes, I know that mice is the plural form of mouse, but I can't resist an obvious rhyming opportunity when it presents itself like that.

6. BONUS: These goth bats are everything. It's like a cute, furry, leathery update on SNL's old Spockets sketches.

PSA: bats are friends, not food. Eating them is what got us all into this Covid mess in the first place.

Happy Wednesday! Are you ready for the first day of the rest of your week? You'd better be, because it's here!

I'm excited, because here at Boredwalk HQ we're the proud mamas & papas of a brand new lint scrubber! Truly, it is a California dream...mostly because of our geographic location, but also because we finally have a solution to the ever-present lint problem in our office. But enough about our fuzz-covered fixtures — you're here for some links!

First, though, I have a question to ask: are you ready for the country? I hope so, because today is the birthday of not one, but TWO honky tonk heroes!

• First up, cut a slice of cake for Mr. Grand Ole Opry himself, Porter Wagoner, born this day in 1927! Mr. Wagoner was a prolific television host and recording artist, charting 81 times between 1954 and 1983 and taping 686 episodes of The Porter Wagoner Show from 1960-1981. He also helped introduce a little-known Nashville songwriter to a much wider audience when he invited Dolly Parton to replace Norma Jean as his regular duet partner on the show. Hey, Porter — thanks! 

• Next, sling a slice across the table to the father of "the Bakersfield sound", Alvis Edgar "Buck" Owens, Jr., born this day in 1929! He and his band The Buckaroos scored 21 No. 1 singles on the Billboard Country Music charts, and he also co-hosted the hit CBS variety show Hee Haw with Roy Clark.

• Finally, happy birthday to Social Security, which was born on this day in 1935 when then-U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt signed the Social Security Bill into law! Social Security is sort of an omnibus designation that covers multiple benefits. The biggest is the OASI benefit (Old-Age & Survivors Insurance), followed by Disability Insurance, Medicare Part A, and Medicare Parts B & D. Chances are if you're living and breathing in the United States in 2020, you or someone you know is currently paying to or benefiting from a Social Security program. Cherish it!

OK, link time!

1. Jon-Michael Frank makes comics for depressives, and they're very on-brand for both Boredwalk and these trying times.

As an artist, I hate artist statements, so I'm not going to try and speak for another one. Just click the link and enjoy!

2. To The Guys I've Dated is a brilliant compendium of real letters written by women to the men who have disappointed them on dates.

It's pretty hilarious.

3. Caesar the therapy llama is here to save us all from ourselves and 2020.

I don't know why I only now am learning about an emotional support llama frequenting protests, but this is awesome!

4. Please, Hammer, don't infect 'em!

This Alabama school principal is doing his level best to stop the spread with his MC Hammer Covid-19 parody. I know the Wednesday email is usually a Covid-free space, but this was pretty freakin' cute.

5. These light box memes from legendary Austin Tex-Mex restaurant El Arroyo never get old.

Plus, they're open for curbside pickup — sweet!